Goddamnit, I Just Got A Ticket For This, And Other Dishonor Roll Tales

Ripped straight from the Oregon State Police’s Fish & Wildlife Division’s June Newsletter:

Just Wanted To Shoot The S**t Out Of Something?

Tpr. Young (Prineville) received a report from a subject who witnessed the illegal take of a bear near Big Summit Prairie. After interviewing the complainant, Young located the suspect. When contacted, the suspect advised he saw a bear near the road he was driving down, stopped, and shot the bear numerous times with a .22 caliber rifle, killing it. The suspect did not harvest the bear and let it go to waste on the hillside. Young examined the bear and recovered two .22 caliber bullets. He seized the suspect’s rifle and removed and gave the bear’s head to ODFW for testing. Young issued the suspect citations for Taking Bear Closed Season and Waste of a Game Mammal.

But, Officer, The Other One We Shot Ran Off So We Had To Shoot Another

Tpr. Olsen (Salem) responded to a call of three individuals who Yamhill County SO deputies stopped in Sheridan and discovered a recently shot deer in the bed of their truck during the stop. After conducting several interviews, the three suspects explained to Olsen they shot the yearling doe only after wounding a buck they were unable to find. Olsen cited the shooter for Taking Deer Closed Season and Hunting Deer Closed Season and the other two suspects each for Aiding in a Wildlife Crime—Taking Deer Closed Season. Olsen seized the deer and two rifles as evidence. He donated the deer to the Union Gospel Mission.

Hi, I’m Skunk As A Drunk, Wanna See My Lishing Ficense?

Sr. Tpr. Hayes (Bend) contacted an angler at Mayfield Pond. During the contact, a subject got out of a car and staggered over to Hayes and belligerently asked if he wanted to see his angling license. After the contact, Hayes observed the subject operating his vehicle. He stopped the subject and subsequently arrested him for DUII, BAC .13.

“Record” Actually Somebody’s Pet Bird

On opening day of turkey season, Sr. Tpr. Cushman (Central Point) investigated a subject who reportedly trespassed to hunt on private property. While preparing a construction bid, the suspect spotted a tom and a hen turkey on the neighbor’s property. The suspect was not familiar with the neighborhood occupants, human or bird. He shot both turkeys over the fence, then he crossed the fence and retrieved them. The suspect likely felt he shot a record-sized turkey; that is, until a witness scorned him about shooting the neighbor’s pet turkeys. The suspect took both turkeys and left. The witness notified the turkeys’ owner. Upon contact, Cushman noted the suspect validated his tag and advised not only were two domestic turkeys taken, but the season was open for bearded or male turkeys only. Cushman cited the suspect for Hunting on the Enclosed Land of Another and seized and returned the turkeys to the owner. The tom weighed 47 pounds. The DA charged the offense as a violation. The trial court convicted the suspect and ordered him to pay a $345 fine and $200 restitution for the turkeys

But Officer, I Only Want The Big Ones!

On Alsea Bay, Tpr. Van Meter (Newport) noticed a clammer empty his sack and put clams back in as if he were counting them. The clammer left the area and put the visibly heavy sack in his pickup. As Van Meter walked toward him, he noticed she was a trooper and yelled he was high-grading. Upon contact, she counted 30 cockle clams over his limit and noted most were large. The subject pleaded to allow him to high-grade. Van Meter cited the subject for Exceeding Daily Limit of Shellfish—Clams, and the clams were returned to the bay.

But Officer, We’re Having A Huge Party

Nine troopers and five volunteers conducted a razor clam saturation patrol on Clatsop County beaches from Seaside to the Columbia River. Rct. Herman (Astoria) observed two diggers put two full jugs of clams in their truck then return to the beach with empty jugs and continued to dig. After the subjects returned to their truck a second time with full jugs, Herman contacted them. One subject had 22 clams in his jug, and the other had 16. After asking for a consent to search the truck, both subjects admitted to having another limit. In the truck, Herman found 52 clams. The diggers said they were going to have a party, so they wanted enough clams for everyone. Herman cited each subject criminally for Exceeding the Daily Bag Limit—Razor Clams. During the patrol, troopers seized 60 clams and donated them to the food bank. Herman cited another subject for Taking Part of Another’s Bag Limit of Razor Clams.

I’m Just Stupid

Sr. Tpr. Cushman (Central Point) checked an angler who tagged his fish in a very peculiar way. The angler put a check mark for the month and wrote the month and day for the day. The angler explained he thought “month” said “mouth” and the check meant that “yes, the fish was hooked in the mouth.” However, the subject had a hard time explaining how in some of the “mouth” boxes, he did not have a check mark but a number, suggesting the fish were hooked other than in the mouth. Cushman warned the subject for Fail to Properly Validate Tag.

I Am The Voice Of Your Conscience – That’s A Tail-snagged Salmon, Release It

Sgt. Meyer (Central Point) worked anglers at Casey State Park near the end of legal angling time, and most of the 20 anglers noted left. After about a half hour, in complete darkness, Meyer watched a subject hook and play a salmon for a long time, while another waited to net it. Meyer worked his way right up behind them. The netter had a headlamp on, and Meyer could easily see the hook in the fish’s tail in the light cast on the fish. The angler appeared to be ready to keep the fish. Meyer told him the fish was hooked in the tail, and the man argued the fish was a “biter” and a “keeper.” Meyer took a step closer. The netter turned and looked at Meyer; and, in doing so, shined his headlamp on a uniformed trooper. The men realized a trooper had been standing near them. Meyer pointed out the hook was still in the tail, and the fish was also a wild salmon. The angler released the fish.

A Stranglehold On Numerous Tickets

Tpr. Imholt (Springfield) checked several anglers at the Alton Baker Pond right after ODFW stocked it with trout. He observed two anglers catch and retain their limit and continue to fish. Imholt contacted the anglers, informing them once they had their limit of five fish, they must stop fishing. Imholt contacted 25 anglers and issued several citations for No 2010 Angling License, No Written Record of Transfer for Trout, and Continuing to Angle after Retaining Limit. Imholt found one angler cited also had a warrant for Strangulation. He lodged this subject into the Lane County Jail.

Goddamnit, I Just Got Ticketed For This, Episode 1

At the Chief Hole, Sgt. Meyer (Central Point) contacted a salmon angler observed using a very long leader preparing to leave. The leader measured almost 10 feet long. When Meyer began to issue the citation for Angling Prohibited Method—Leader over 6 Feet in Length, the man became very upset and belligerent, saying he just received a citation for the same offense. After checking, Meyer found Sr. Tpr. Cushman (Central Point) cited him less than three weeks prior for the same violation.

Goddamnit, I Just Got Ticketed For This, Episode 2

Sgt. Meyer (Central Point) and Sr. Tpr. Cushman (Central Point) worked the Hatchery Hole. Cushman saw a subject cast under the rope, trying to snag salmon 10 feet or so above the deadline where the fish swim into the hatchery. Cushman sneaked closer and watched the subject continue his illegal activities. When Cushman stepped out, the subject walked off. Knowing which vehicle was the subject’s, Cushman had Meyer meet him there. While Meyer waited, Cushman checked the area, but he could not find the subject. Cushman checked a nearby bathroom, but nobody appeared to be in the bathroom. He peered below the stall doors and did not see any feet on the floor. When Cushman pushed the unlocked stall door open, he found the subject standing on the toilet. Cushman and Meyer contacted the subject when he exited the bathroom. When Cushman began writing a citation for Angling Prohibited Area—Above the Deadline, the subject became very cantankerous, cursing and throwing his wallet down, for Sr. Tpr. Collom (Central Point) cited him for the same offense at the same location a few weeks prior.

That Road-Killed Cougar Sure Would Look So Good On My Wall!

Sr. Tpr. Klepp (Astoria) received a report of a subject unlawfully possessing a cougar. Klepp’s investigation revealed a suspect took a cougar from the side of the road on Hwy 26, then he obtained a cougar tag at a nearby grocery store. The suspect later, with the aid of two men, dressed and transported the cougar’s carcass, hide, and skull. Klepp retrieved the hide from the taxidermist and the skull and carcass from another person. All the suspects involved stated they thought they could legally take the road-killed animal provided the season was open and they had a tag. Klepp cited the suspect for Illegal Possession of Road-Struck Cougar.


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